


(Don't) Wake me up before you Go-go

by Kelsey_Jaybird



Category: Green Lantern (Comics), Green Lantern - All Media Types, The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: Barry Allen Needs a Hug, Barry Allen needs a new couch too, Best Friends, Comedy, Fluff without Plot, M/M, Mentions of John Stewart and Bruce Wayne, Porn with Feelings, Sinestro is a terrible house guest, Sleepover from Hell, sex on a couch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-11-30 06:15:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11457687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kelsey_Jaybird/pseuds/Kelsey_Jaybird
Summary: Barry Allen is awoken in the middle of the night by what he assumes to be a burglar. He is wrong. So very wrong.Confessions are made, floors are damaged, and Barry Allen reads the most boring book imaginable to get to sleep after waking up to his best friend having sex in his living room and dutifully not making a fuss.Barry Allen is truly the greatest best friend a space-faring lite-brite-cop and his surly moustached friend could ask for.





	(Don't) Wake me up before you Go-go

**Author's Note:**

> OMFGosh that title is shite. 
> 
> I decided to write a fic for one of DC's most underappreciated pairings, and because I'm worn out from working on the incredibly depressing Freefall (new chapter coming soon!) I decided to write a comedy. I hope this brings a smile to your face.

Barry Allen was jolted from his sleep by a loud grunt and the clang of metal falling to the floor. His first thought was “I knew I should have kept the good TV in my room” and his second was “Hal!” 

His space-faring best friend was crashing on his couch, as he often did after arriving back on Earth after a tour with the Lanterns. Carol hadn't been as accommodating lately, so Barry picked up the slack. Hal cleaned the house and watered the plants while he was at work, so it wasn't a bad deal. Good enough to open his floor and air mattress to a recently re-greened Sinestro, at Hal's insistence that he would take up the cooking too. John thought Hal's “stupid crush” on the alien was getting out of hand and practically begged Barry not to do it, but Barry was really sick of cooking. Given the amount that Barry ate, the deal seemed almost unfair. Now, as the sudden rush of realization kicked in, it seemed dangerous. With the rogue Koragarian in his apartment, it might not be the average thief that rudely awoke him. 

Barry wondered if Hal and Sinestro could handle this, but then he heard a high whine of pain. Barry sped to his closet, grabbed a bat, and sped to the living room. He didn't want to reveal his powers to just anyone, but if his guests were in danger...Nora Allen didn't raise an ungracious host. Someone was in for a beating. 

Barry froze in his tracks as soon as he saw the scene in his living room. Well, someone was getting a beating, but not of the bat-to-the-head variety. 

Hal was face down on the couch, Sinestro over him. Barry raised his bat to defend his friend, but then noticed the various articles of clothing surrounding the couch and air mattress, and heard the noises more clearly. Hal moaned deeply, rolling over to capture his former enemy and long-standing “stupid crush's” lips in a searing kiss. The Koragarian returned the kiss with fervor, before pushing Hal onto his back and crawling over him, showing Barry much more than the speedster had ever wanted to see. 

As the Flash, Barry often found himself in life or death situations. He fought land sharks and psychic gorillas, alien despots and evil clowns, some guy with a freeze ray and sometimes alternate versions of himself. He had been saved from death by his powers many times. However, Barry had never been more grateful for super-speed than in the moment he saw his best friend get frisky with a moustachioed alien on his couch. He was back in his room, door shut and locked, in less than a millisecond. 

It suddenly made sense why Carol wasn't big on Hal staying with her. Barry was going to have a talk with Hal about boundaries and things not to do on an expensive couch that cost half his monthly salary, but that was a talk that could wait until Hal had more clothes on. Now that Barry thought of it, when Sinestro had more clothes on. 

Barry was dismayed to find that he could still hear the two of them as clearly as if he were in the room. Not only could he hear moans, grunts and “harder”, he could also hear his couch sliding across the room and probably scratching up his nice floor. Yeah, sleep was not coming easily. Neither, apparently, was Sinestro. 

Luckily, some of Bruce's paranoia had transferred to him after years of working together. Barry went to his bedside table and pulled out an extremely concentrated form of NyQuil, ear plugs built for Superman's insomnia, and the most boring book he could think of, “An Extended History of Corporate Accounting”. He pounded back the sleepy juice and put in the earplugs. The book was for emergencies only. 

Barry Allen slid his earplugs into place, crawled into his worn but comfy bed, and folded his pillow so it covered both his ears. It seemed to work....for about five seconds before he realized that he could still feel the vibrations of the couch along the floor. Buying such a sturdy couch seemed like such a good idea too, it would last him a while and it was perfect for his friends (read: Hal Jordan) to crash on after a hard day at work (read: in space). Barry regretted few things in his life, but in this moment, that couch was one of them. 

He glanced the clock resting on the nightstand. 3 AM. He had work in four hours. Maybe, Barry thought, I should switch to the night shift. Then I can conveniently be at work for...whatever this is. 

The vibrations stopped. Barry, hesitantly took out his earplugs, praying that it had finally ended. There was only heavy breathing and the shifting of the apartment. As he was about to put his earplugs back in he heard seventeen words clearly in the sudden silence. 

“I love you, Sin. So much.”

“Hush. I love you too, Hal. I always have.”

Well. That was sweet. Barry felt his heart swell. Hal had been in love with Sinestro forever, probably as long as he had been GL. He had been getting his heart broken by the alien for almost as long. Sinestro always seemed kind of obsessed with Hal and really liked tying him up for some reason. Barry felt good knowing that whatever was happening in his living room was born from mutual love rather than a primal need. Now, he could sleep happy-ish. 

Barry slid his earplugs back in. The vibrations returned in earnest, and Barry was sure he was losing the security deposit over the state of the floor. He glanced back at the clock. 3:10. The NyQuil was showing no signs of kicking in, and the alien love fest on the couch was probably going to continue until morning. 

Barry sat up and grabbed his book. Desperate times called for spreadsheets and proper pocket protecting, it seemed.

**Author's Note:**

> Barry should listen to John more often, eh? 
> 
> About the book: both my parents are accountants so I constantly take pot-shots at the profession. As I said at the beginning, I hope you at least get a chuckle out of this silly story.


End file.
